Day In. Day Out.

Ever have one of those days where you're just sick of excuses, of people's fears, of being told you're not good enough because of the color of your skin, or you don't fit a certain mold? Do you ever get tired of trying to keep positive as you're bombarded with one disappointment after the other over the course of a few years? Well that's what I feel like tonight...just tired of the constant fight with life and with myself.  Trying to please parents and not be a selfish jack ass to people...Tonight sucks. Plain and simple.  Pushing myself to be better, striving to get everything so simple, everything that I know will be more satisfying and fulfilling than all the money or power in the world, just looking for a human connection on my own terms...this shit just gets tiring some days.  I got so much to give and it all seems so half assed some days.  And I still know I'll get up tomorrow, tired as hell, and I'll do it all over again... And the real kicker is everything I've just written would be seen as weakness, for that is the burden of being a man, not showing it, the way a woman is allowed to because each gender is suppose to act a certain way. Tomorrows another day...fuck tomorrow...it always seems so far away, for tomorrow is the same shit and it seems exactly like today.

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