Out The Otherside.

Cut away the  part of me that has me trapped. You'll never understand it till you are caught beneath the weight. Even if we could be together what makes me think it could work? What's to say you're not the same or worse than all I've been with? Who knows. Guess I'll never know. There's been so many and so few. I'm thinking of stepping down, but who can quit while they still love the game? 8 years later and nothings really changed. Still fighting the good fight. Still failing as the sun fails and turns to night.  The words the heart say just get in the way of bodily satisfaction. Bodily satisfaction gets in the way of the truth the heart says. Neither wins and I live in sin with my self. Good vs. evil, angel vs. sinner, two in one, closer and further away than ever. That which is meant to be always finds its way to you in the end. But the end seems never near, the beginning is never clear. My dear, my dear, I ask you with a heart sincere. Show me the way to infinite happiness, or leave me to another set of tears- I'm talking to me, can't u hear ? Alone is never a bad thing, lest you end there maliciously. I feel like I'm about to start the life I've always wanted, yet I'm scared as hell. Time has come and time goes on and where exactly I will end up I can't tell. I feel something deeper calling me, the universe sets my inner fire in motion. The symphony plays in my chest, my mind rebels from the commotion- wishing for silence and a sense of clarity. These are the days that matter to kids that are just trying to figure themselves out. At some point they have to do it on their own. Me being one of them, knowing I still have yet so far to go. For all I've done, all the mistakes I've sown, I'm still proud of who've I've become. My own friend to the end. My debts to myself are paid in full, time to start life and smile like everything is new.